** Sorry, no pics because I am having trouble attaching them.
This week is Thanksgiving, but more importantly, it marks the end "weekend life" around here. Because every day since August has felt like a Saturday around here with Joe off work. Joe has slowly started back to work, first trading from home and as of next week, going into the office 3-4 days a week. And, with that I will have to adjust to once again getting both kids out of the house by myself every day, planning ahead because I can't just leave one behind when we are running late or someone isn't cooperating and getting up earlier (normal mom time) because there won't be anyone here to sit with them at breakfast while I shower. And, I can't wait. And, Joe can't either. As amazing as it has been having Joe around, the past few months have taught me a lot about myself.
1) First, that we need routine. After about 1 week in our new house, we spent more time figuring out who would do what each day, take who with them, etc. So, quickly we decided it was best that I handle the kids during work hours like I always had. And, Joe would go into the office, set up his home office, work on projects around the house, etc So, although Joe was available and home when I needed him, the majority of the time I took the kids 8-5 to school, activities, etc but Joe was able to be home most days or stay with one of the kids if needed. This leads me to the next one.
2) I have a problem with leaving my kids. Over the past few years, I always thought it would be so nice to have a husband who worked from home so I could run out and do this-and-that, plan some day trips to visit friends, etc. Now I had the opportunity to take some time and I found being away from the kids made me anxious. I had always been the first person they saw in the morning and often the last one at night. Missing either of these times made me feel like I was missing out on something. I would find myself rushing home from things. When Joe was working, I didn't mind running out at bedtime because I felt he hadn't seen them all day and needed this one-on-one time. With him home, seeing them during the day, I felt like I needed to here more so they wouldn't forget I was their main caregiver (no competition at all around here.)
3) Joe is not cut out for the stay-at-home life and now understands why I think I deserve a salary (like $1 million/yr from the govt?) Joe spent the last 4 years telling me he would love to be a stay-at-home-dad. I tried to explain how hard it can be if you are a person who likes to get things done, shower, eat nice relaxing meals (his case) or live in a really organized house with everything in it's place (my case.) Thanks to the past few months, I think he gets why people say it's the hardest job in the world and he's happily going to jump on that train in January. Not that he doesn't love being with his kids, but I think staying home is a hard adjustment for any parent (including yours truly) and I had 4 years of practice compared to his 4 months.
4) More time does not equal more productive, in my case. One would assume that because Joe was home often I would have tackled every thing on my "list of things I will do one day when I have free time." But, because I had some extra time is precisely why didn't do these things. Because I had lived the past two years going so fast trying to take care of two little kids, never feeling like I could give them 100% of my attention and keep up with all the things that made the house run smooth (like having food and clean floors.) So, I multi-tasked everything. A minute to rest was being lazy because there was too much to do. Over the last few months, instead of being productive during my down time, I found myself doing things that I knew I would miss when he went back to work, like taking my time getting ready in the morning or sitting on Pinterest while I drank my morning coffee (instead of making Lucy's school lunch.)
5) I hate running day errands by myself. I never had a lot of time before to run day errands - and with kids in tow, they weren't errands, they were outings (two different things) that didn't happen much. I always thought friends who got sitters so they could take a weekly run to Target and Trader Joe's sounded so relaxing. But, I had the opportunity to do these things - free childcare of course - and I just found them such a waste of time and money. I am grateful for my kids, because an errand has to be really necessary to take both with me, and therefore, they keep me from running pointless errands (the ones taken just because you have 30 minutes to fill and there's something you might need in a few months that would be good to have in case.) And, honestly, I have more fun taking my kids with me to do these things. Partly because I like a good challenge, and anytime you leave Target with your kids you feel like you conquered the world in addition to crossing detergent off your list.
6) I like brushing things off because I'm a mom of two kids. Anytime I lose something, forget to pack essentials, have to put my make-up on in the car, forget someone's birthday or am running late, I chalk it up to being a busy mom of kids and I let myself off the hook and move on with my day. It's a great way to live. I lost my 3rd phone since August at the mall a few weeks ago. It clearly was stolen, Leigh was hungry and tired. We bought a new one at Verizon while my old one was still being moved around the mall by it's new owner and left. No worries. Had I not had Leigh with me, I probably would have been standing at the mall exit checking people's purses and been mad all day about losing it. What I realized these last few months is that it's nice to have a excuse to let yourself off the hook when you break a computer or lose your purse. In my case, less chaos in my life means more pressure to be perfect.
So, as much as we will miss having Joe at home for breakfast and the girls will miss having daddy take them to their classes/school, here's to the start of our new routine!
